thanks for listening to my views. She wants to go to ANYONE (atleast any relative that shes familiar with) instead of me; her dad most importantly. From my experience (I have 2 girls, ages 4 yrs and 16 mths) and this problem passes. Since about 3 months old she prefers daddy over mommy but now it is to the point where she tells me I dont love you I love my daddy. She pushes me away and wants nothing to do with me. i dun get to spent time with her during weekdays..my husband dun understand me wat i am going through . Im a single 18 year old mother who still lives at home with my parents and siblings. Just recently he has started clinging to Daddy again, and I noticed that it was coinciding with feeling quite homesick (I live abroad, far away from my parents and siblings). When you spend time with your baby, make it 'quality' time . One is of course that it will bring baby and dad closer, which is probably not something you see as important right now, but in the long run, being close to both parent is optimal. That's where you come to her rescue and change all that with this gift for a mom going back to work. And as being the preferred caretaker at the moment, your mom can help you a lot by firmly handing over your daughter to you at certain points. Our third daughter cant seem to stand me and it is really breaking my heart. Which just doesnt help at all! RIght now he is identifying with dad. Any idiot can get pregnant but being a loving mother is something entirely different. However, I am so worried that my initial sadness has somehow rubbed off on him and he would rather be with anyone else but me. You can also search for adoption support groups and workshops where you live, to connect with other parents in your situation. I feel as though he hates me. I try to fix this by not responding to the kid and shouting at her and show her that I am bad. I can see other parents are having similar problems, so maybe it is something she will grow out of in time. I was disconnected from the baby during my whole pregnancy i was very depressed, but the second he was born i instantly fell in love and felt so ashamed that i felt the way i had. youre missing out, and so is your baby. Newborn Baby Rejects Dad. I dont know if maybe he was picking up on my dark mood, my insecurities? I did not breastfeed her as a baby. I dont get it. No phone, no talking to your wife, no planning of the next day at work. I am very responsive with both. This is NOT just a phase. I play with, love and nurture my 17 month old boy but he doesnt seem to care about me. xxx. (cross-post with Working Moms) I go back to work in a week and my 2.5 month old daughter refuses to take bottles. For the mom with low milk supply who is supplementing with bottles her baby may start refusing to breastfeed. even when am not with her she plays with her grand mother or even neighbors. I have a 1yr-old son and he just started this him not wanting me always want the other family member that is around. I know you'll be great. I am a stay at home mom with an almost one year old baby girl. I couldnt see it coming and this is my first child, I love him very much, but this reaction I get from him is very unpleasant and hurtful to me. Most likely, your son is going through a phase when he is turning out towards the world. I have read all of the posts and it is kind of a double edge sword to say that I am glad that other people are or have gone through the same things that I am going through. Its easy to be an outsider giving advice, but take it from someone who felt similarly rejected by her own child, I really urge you to consider seeking help and support from a source not on the inside of your situation. Otherwise, you will reinforce her wishes to put distance between the two of you and her wish to go to the other person, where does not experience any bad emotions. I am with him most of anyone. Like many of you, I am a working mother who loves her baby girl more than anything in the world. My mother in law lives in my basement suite and looks after my son 2 days a week, my mom looks after him 1 day a week. You can read more about baby development at different months here. Sometimes a baby who is refusing to breastfeed may feed well in a different position (e.g. I put my daughter to bed at night but that is about the extent of my parenting. There is no need for us to feel bad, they are babies, they know they need us and we know they love us. This has been completely devastating to me. It is quite common to hear new moms worrying about that the love at first sight that they expected when meeting their child for the first time didnt happen. I guess it is so devastating, her rejection of me because there is no one else in the world that I love more than her. Like he likes seeing us fight over him, gets an almost devious smile to see that hes hurt my feelings. I love him so much and have never felt so hurt or rejected. Although I?m not working my mother in law takes care of him most of the time as he hates to be with me. I found the update posts from those parents who were in this situation and came out the other side especially helpful. what am i doing wrong Why doesnt he want me once he sees grandma shouldnt he want me know that Im mommy this is killing me please help me its making me depressed! Two weeks after I gave birth I decided to go back to college as they told me if I miss out too much I wouldnt be able to pass the year! Here you go honey!. So who knows, within a month, you might be carrying a whining little daughter all day long. He cant be without her for even a minute. Very scary! Paula, please give me some advice! He will go to Nursery without a second glance and to any family or friend without so much as a look of concern over to me. I had to return to work recently (4 days a week) and daddy is at home more and takes my son to nursery and picks him up. I totally understand that you are thinking about another job, and maybe that isnt such a bad idea over time But until then or if you choose not to, there are a few things you can do. In fact she would scream and cry I will always take her out of her room and try to pacify her. I know a significant factor in my issues with my son was my inability to bond because of my terrible adjustment to being a mother/post partum depression. I feel robbed of the moments that I didnt get to enjoy with him, she pushed to give him his first bath and has done so much as she says she is helping. Can a baby NOT like their mom? Reclaim your motherhood of your child. But he just doesnt seem to need me. We dont know what happened while she was in the other state but I think she needs to have that bond with her mother. Give your baby extra cuddles, touches, and comfort. My Mom is the one that takes care of most things around the house while I am working. Let's look at why a baby rejects mom after going back to work, and some helpful tips on what to do about it! She should be proud to have raised such a loving mom. At about 12 months she became very much a mammas girl and now when i leave her to go to work she is loving to my boyfriend when i am gone but when she can see me she seems to hate him. That doesnt mean that he doesnt love you. If grandad isnt there he wants to no me but if he is there he just blanks me, i try my hardest to try get his attention with no luck he just ignores me & blanks me. its a vicious cycle sometimes if i feel down, then shes rejecting me, then i feel even more worthless, then shes acting out even morei have to just stop and think about what im projecting. Getting the Right Child Care. I have a 16 or 17 month cousin, but she calls me Mom! Some things you can try to reconnect faster are to: Laugh together! so its my mom or her caretaker. wont she not even a day look out for me. Also get yourself a baby sling and carry her around as much as you can while running around. Dont let this woman take your child. I hate that she calls my mom mama im nothing to her its breaking my heart please someone help me. I thought my daughter was the only one to behave this way. I just cant get the image of her red angry little face out of my mind. Its putting a lot of strain on our relationship. But the best thing you can do is to NOT take it personal. This can of course be very tough on the other parent, especially for someone who is used to be the preferred one. I have never been away from her for more than 2 hours before this and now she doesnt even care to see me. Its been in the past few weeks that I have noticed that my almost year old son basically forgets that Im here when my husband or my mother walks in the door. But they have become my competitors And I start having bad feeling towards them. Its all new to me and its hard to mother when youre only 22. Im starting to become resentful of my husband (who is not taking me seriously at all) and even worse my son xx. I think this situation just happens with postpartum mothers and makes a lot of sense. she sees her dad may be once or twice a months. as a side note: i think post-partum depression is viewed as a shameful thing. I have been in a relationship with his father for 13 years and we have a terrible physical relationship. and youre doing the right thing. At the moment we are living in India with my husband and his parent, my son seems to be attached to them more than me. Your baby will not feel abandoned by you when you return to work. Take days of vacation or maternal leave, ask your mom to bring your daughter to your work for lunch, work from home, let go of as many of your chords as you can or do them together with your daughter, co-sleep with her, talk to her, bathe with her, sing to her. Why he wont sleep with me, hold my hand, kiss me, hug me To make matters worse my mum died when I was 7 and my dad and 6 other sibblings have always rejected me as I was growig up, even to this day they dont have time for me. You are not the only mother this has happened to. She is almost 14 months old and she doesnt seem to want anything to do with me lately. Sep. 5, 2016. She is my first child and she is the most pleasant little thing ever so I dont understand why she doesnt all of the sudden not want nothing to do with me. Those five weeks where he preferred his daddy over me where the hardest things Ive had to face since becoming a mum. I have an 8-month-old little girl and she does the same thing to me! It isn't exactly easy, balancing the needs of your child with likely way less sleep than you're used to, while trying to be the same employee you were before you left. 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